Monochromatic monologues
For the longest time, some of us have struggled because we had no way to store important links and information on WhatsApp for easy findability.
The result is that our husbands or partners are inadvertent targets for all kinds of information that they had no need for. My husband routinely gets messages from me with the word reference in the message. Such encrypted messages include recipes, links to articles on writing, messages with tips on weight reduction in 2 days, insane memes that he can’t understand even if he bothered to check, dates for important festivals, and details about who delivers the best mangoes in our apartment — in short, critical information.
The word reference is an indication that he need not waste precious time looking at that message from me. This safeword is important. Messages that do not have this word, if left unread, can have disastrous consequences. For him.
A friend told me that she circumvented this problem by creating WhatsApp groups containing her husband and herself — several groups in fact, depending on the topic of messages being sent to the group. Mango. Coconut oil. Ayurveda. Lost animals. Cats. Cows. Head lice. She has many such groups, apparently.
Then she unceremoniously removes him from these groups. I don’t think he complains. If he had done something similar, however…
We developed our workarounds to store critical information that came via WhatsApp. Life was chugging along. But I guess WhatsApp was listening closely and acted on our needs.
Cut to current times. I just discovered that you can send a message to yourself on WhatsApp. Seriously!
- Save your phone number on your phone. You wouldn’t do that normally, I guess. But which normal person would WhatsApp themselves?
I saved my name as — you’ll never guess this — Me! Also included Anu A to prevent any confusion. - Search for whatever name you saved your number as, and start messaging. Enjoy! You are terribly welcome!
I sent a message to myself. In fact, I sent a pretty funny joke. I checked after some time if I had seen it. There were two blue ticks.
- I had seen the joke
I waited for a bit.
- There was no response
If I had read the joke and found it funny, I should have sent a laughing emoji, right?
- Nothing
I had just been seen-zoned by myself.
I felt awful. I can tolerate being seen-zoned by others. But being ignored by myself? That was enough to send me into a pit of depression.
I sent myself a comment about something I read in another group.
- I replied with a contradictory point of view
I thought that point of view was very narrow-minded and said so.
- I got angry and tried to leave the group
- I could not find the exit button to leave the group. So I posted a bunch of angry emojis
Now I am not talking to myself. So I can’t actually send all those useful things to myself. I’ve gone back to spamming my husband.
Sending WhatsApp messages to oneself has its perils. Just wanted to warn you by sharing some of my experiences.
Anu Anniah Writes 